TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... THE INTRUDER IS A "CLUTCH GUY" FROM THE DARKSIDE WITH A PRAYING MANTIS HEAD?!? NOW WHAT?!?...

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Break the conventional chains which bind you to the belief that the only things in this world that exist are those we're able to touch and see in daylight. Ever heard of quantum physics?- Many credible physicists and scientists from the world's most prestigious of learning institutions now believe that parallel universes exist all around us-- We are likely surrounded by spectacular space, time, energy, and matter anomalies that boggle the brain, proving that what was once thought to be fantasy and fiction, can now be believed as truth and fathomable fact... We offer you a slice of hard science, combined with sporadic sprinklings of paranormal phenomena, as we here at Drag Racing Underground, proudly present to you...TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER...Step out of the narrow-minded mist that encircles those who wear their stagnate skepticism like an outdated peach-colored leisure suit, and allow yourself the freedom to follow the adventures of drag racing's infinite and most indestructible spirit of the afterlife... Pull up a chair, toss your inhibitions aside, and ride along with one Sebastian Conrad, strong spirited eternal speed freak extraordinaire. 


Last week's episode told of how our favorite metaphysical/afterlife drag racing dream team were finally home at their racing compound/headquarters, after being assigned by the Heavenly Drag Racing Association on yet another mission of hot-rod motoring mayhem. Our group just finished up a meeting at the kitchen table, where leader Larry Lamb firmly stated that he wants his subordinates to work on improving their tactical supernatural skills, including their skills of telepathy, clairvoyance, alchemy manipulation and psychic telekinesis -- these are the special skills that Larry insisted need to be cleverly combined with their basic drag racing skills, in order to insure that they're prepared for ANYTHING the deranged darkside of the drag racing afterlife throw their way. Then, Larry Lamb switched disciplinary gears to a more relaxed and casual mode, congratulating Maria on being a winner in her very first bout of on-track drag racing competition, during their recent covert assignment at a Darkside Drag Racing Association sanctioned sand dragster event. Maria triumphantly defeated former champion beatnik chick  'Dastardly Darla' in a grueling 'ladies only' sand digger duel... 

"Well, I'm gonna change out of this beatnik bikini, wash up, and make some notes in my diary." says Maria as she breaks from a long group hug the crew were engaging in, and starts walking to her quarters... Only moments later, the guys hear Maria scream out loud "AAAAARRRRH!!! THERE'S SOMETHING FROM THE DARKSIDE UNDER MY BED!!!! IT'S WEARING A FIRE SUIT AND AN OLD SCHOOL DRAG RACING RESPIRATOR MASK!!!!--- IT'S A GRUESOME MINIATURE-SIZED LIFE FORM, ER, OR, AN AFTERLIFE FORM THAT I'VE NEVER, EVER SEEN BEFORE!!!!!"... All the guys are rattled by Maria's cry for help, as well as a hideous gurgling sound that's obviously emanating from the unwelcome intruder!! They drop what they're doing and proceed to make a mad dash to Maria's quarters.... "OH NO!!!" exclaims Larry Lamb when seeing the scaled-down beast "SOMEONE HURRY AND GET ME MY STRONGEST DEFENSIVE FAIRY DUST!!!”... With Larry's abrupt order, Peter The Parrot takes to flight, right to the compound's emergency metaphysical arsenal storage cabinet. He grabs a packet of premium defensive fairy dust in his beak, and flies directly back to Larry Lamb at the scene of the creepy commotion. Larry frantically pulls the packet of fairy dust from Peter's beak, opens it up, and liberally commences sprinkling it on the impending threatening gear-headed ghoul!!!...

The small but sinister appearing creature loses its aggressive angst and power as the defensive fairy dust starts to affect its psyche. In a matter of seconds, the eerie apparition is stunned and far more complacent, though it's oozing some kind of foul, bubbling ectoplasm from beneath its respirator mask. Sebastian grabs the top of the mask and yanks it off the intruder's head... "I recognize that little twerp!!" blurts Fred The Wrench "His name is Mantis!! He's a clutch ghoul and bottom-end guy for the darkside's Funny Car fleet!! We go way back!! I've competed against his teams, and we've been wrenching rivals for a long, long time!!"... "THAT'S RIGHT, FREDDY-BOY!!" gurgles Mantis, with the sound of supernatural sorcery in his delivery "I CAME HERE JUST WANTING TO BORROW SOME TOOLS!!! THAT'S ALL!!!"... "Yeah, right!" replies Fred "Don't think any of us believe that crock! You broke into our compound and are here for some kind of trouble, AND you practically scared our dear Maria out of her skin!!!"... "That he did!!" concurs Maria,"And you know what, Mantis is sure an appropriate name for this little creep, because his head sure looks like a praying mantis to me!!"... "YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?!?!" Mantis shouts at Maria... "Maybe I do," comes back Maria in a sharp tone, "Don't praying mantises eat each other's heads or something sick like that??"... "ONLY THE FEMALES DO THAT!!!" gurgles Mantis, "I'M A GUY!!!!"... "Ahem," interjects Larry Lamb, clearing this throat to command attention, "So, what are we to do with this oddball intruder from the drag racing afterlife's darkside?? He's definitely some strange mix of insipid interspecies creation!!! I don't trust him one bit!!!"...

 

Yes, my dear friends, this is the mysterious mind-bending-hereafter rebirth, and puzzling parallel universe relocation of the bewildering being, energy, and entity we call THE PHANTOM RACER...  Hmm, so, what WILL our do-gooder, heavenly drag racing team do with this darkside wrenching apparition?!?!? What should they do with this pint-sized sinister intruder with a head that looks much like that of a praying mantis??? This grotesque, gurgling ghoul has obviously covertly invaded our crew's space, and let's face it, we don't REALLY know why 'Mantis' broke into the compound, and why he was hiding under Maria's bed?!?!?... Fred The Wrench and the rest of the gang certainly aren't buying his "I just wanted to borrow some tools" excuse... WHAT THE HECK IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT?!?!?... What's in store for our drag racing paranormal dream team as they continue to embark on unpredictable drag racing adventures throughout the parallel universes??... Can they all hold it together and successfully champion the powers of good??... Or will they fall victim to evil entities they cannot control???... These are just a few of the mind-twisting questions to be answered in future action-packed episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER!!... There's more paranormal mystical and maniacal drag race mayhem coming your way!!... You definitely do not want to miss it...

Stay tuned next Wednesday for a new chapter of the serial paranormal drama series we call TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER... Be sure that YOU follow the story of Sebastian Conrad... Bookmark this page and BE HERE every Wednesday!!... You can read prior episodes of TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER by simply clicking on the 'DOC'S BLOG' link that's conveniently located atop this page, and then scrolling to her Wednesday blog installments (because this series is published here each and every Wednesday). All characters appearing in this series are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. TALES OF THE PHANTOM RACER story and imagery are copyright 2017 DRAG RACING UNDERGROUND.